The November Slump


It is worth noting that I wrote this post with every intention of posting it straight after I'd finished (on Saturday 12th November) writing it but once I'd finished, checked it for spelling mistakes and knocked up a header image, it was well after midnight so I thought it best to schedule it to go live the next morning :)

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I watched a video today by Dodie Clark (This one, go watch, she's fab!) which she made about her recent tour, her mental health on tour and her upcoming EP release. In this video she said something that really resonated with me and made me think: "There is always an up after a down."


Now for a little context; today was not a good day. I got up, I got dressed, I hugged my dog, I went and had a lovely lunch with my lovely friends and I came home. That all was fabulous but my head? Oh no today was not a good head day. My head feels so full and clunky and clogged with all the things I have to do and say (sorry there's a lot of 'ands' in this run on mess of a sentence) and it's driving me a little bit crazy.

There is always an up after a down. It's inevitable. You're devastatingly sad but you will be happy again, you will smile again and be cheerful. It's simple, right?

I'm okay with downs. I have a lot of them. Downs and I are pals of old. However today I was so down that it felt like my emotions inside my head were trying to crush me. I was okay with my friends, I felt absolutely fine with them. It's the alone moments today that haven't been so great.

Anyways that quote from Dodie got me thinking about what I have to look forward to, in an effort to cheer myself up, and I had a sort of thunderbolt realisation that I always feel like this in November.

I'm the type of person that absolutely throws myself into September/October time. Fresh starts, new projects, new me etc. However by the time November trickles round I feel like I've run out of steam. I get sad and feel like I'm not accomplishing things fast enough. I struggle to do anything, even things I enjoy are a mammoth task and just leave me feeling drained.

Example: This September I started a new job, a new course at college and pretty much gave my life a massive shake up. Then in October I went on arguably one of the best holidays of my life to New York, Toronto and Chicago. Then I came home and it was November and those sad feelings began slowly descending in on me like that creepy fog you see in black & white horror films.

If I look back in recent years, there is a pattern! Sept/Oct = Good, yay, positive! November = Doom, gloom and oh god why am I not better at life yet?!

This is wholly uninteresting and boring, I know but I've never before realised that I have a habit of falling into a slump in November and it's rocked my world a little bit.

Hannah Gale and Vix Meldrew have both recently written brilliant posts about their struggles with SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) and in reading their posts, I relate to a lot of what they're saying. It never occurred to me that this could be what's wrong with me.

Some people will scoff at the idea of SAD and say oh no you're just depressed etc but I do suffer from depression and that is a year round thing but I honestly do feel like SAD perfectly describes how I feel right now.

I actually feel so much better, lighter even, after this little epiphany and writing this post has been so damn cathartic. Just getting all my feelings out of my head and figuring out what's wrong. It is the worst feeling in the world when you feel sad or emotional and you can't put your finger on the reason why.

Have you ever struggled with SAD? What do you do to combat it? Let me know in the comments!

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